I’m sometimes kept awake by a sense of emptiness that even music cannot chase away. It has come to my attention that life is never going to be the way I want it to be, and I will be forever searching and unsatisfied. Under some circumstances the things I desire will never be mine. However, life goes on. I believe that one of the ways to be happy is to accept, and even love life the way it is, despite the brutality and emptiness of it— I’m trying to have such abilities. In other words, I’m trying to grow up, as much as I don’t want to, becasue I feel like I have to— it’s time.